How did someone get Doom running inside an SQL database?

The internet's longest-running dare — "can it run Doom?" — reached a new low level on Oct 2: someone ported the 1993 classic to run entirely inside a SQL database.

The internet's longest-running dare — "can it run Doom?" — reached a new low level on Oct 2: someone ported the 1993 classic to run entirely inside a SQL database. WHY it's more than a joke: SQL databases are quietly Turing-complete compute engines, and Doom's minimalist renderer can be expressed as database queries — which tells you how much unused compute hides inside infrastructure you already run. The HOW for learners: "port Doom to it" is a legitimate rite of passage in programming — pick a stack you want to learn, replicate something you understand completely, and let the breakage teach you.

If you want to learn databases, query engines, or low-level graphics, few exercises teach systems thinking faster.